I don’t think there could’ve been any other way of returning to this blog, really.
It’s rather fitting too, I think. I haven’t posted here since July – why? Well, loads of different reasons. Education, work, life things. The biggest reason?
Seemingly like Adele, finding myself in a state of happiness and content has led to a block on being able to create, and write, and have a handle on my craft. It’s oddly difficult to express how you feel when they’re feelings that are still so very much new to you.
Give me heartache – easy. Loss? No problem. Anything on the other end of the spectrum, it’s almost completely alien to describe.
Perhaps the other reason, too, I feel Adele may agree with; I just don’t feel the need to express anything. My love, the wonder and all the joy I’m experiencing really is just for me. It’s an unconsciously selfish response to being unhappy and hurt for so long, and finally feeling everything I longed to feel.
Maybe, that needs to change. For me, for him: for all of you. Perhaps I need to learn to slowly unravel the mystery of love and happiness, and understand how exactly to express it.
To him, he knows. I hope I tell him enough what he means to me.
To the outside world, it’s a different story. I hope 2016 is the year I build on that.